The philosophy of positive guidance is one that is often misunderstood. Both by observers and practitioners.
First Friday Q&A : Dealing with a Defiant “NO”
So what do you do about a toddler who suddenly says “NO” to everything? Here are some of my thoughts featured in this month’s First Friday Q&A.
(Those who pay close attention will notice this growing baby boy is using up some of my lung capacity. :0)
Spare the Rod: What Spanking Teaches Children
I heard a comedian the other day, who really made a good point. He said essentially this: “My friends are always questioning my choice not to spank my kids. They’ll often say, “Never? You’ll never spank you kids? There’s no situation where you think you might need to spank your kids?” When I say I’ll never hit my wife, nobody says, “Never? You’ll never hit your wife? There’s no situation where you think you might need to hit your wife?” This logic got a good laugh from the crowd, and I think it was spot-on.
Positive Guidance Tools of the Trade – Modeling
Charles Barkley is notorious for saying he is not a role model. While this provided for an interesting campaign, and has the best intentions (implying parents should be a child’s primary role models, not athletes) it’s still a bit flawed. (Sorry, Chuck.) The truth is, any adult in view of a child, is to some degree a role model. I mean, break down the word. A role model is someone who demonstrates how a role is filled. They are modeling behavior. This is contingent upon a child being able to observe you, not upon your willingness or objection to being considered such. Children are watching all around them and picking up cues on how to navigate social situations. They are looking for social behavior to emulate as references for navigating their own social situations.
Positive Guidance Tools of the Trade – Choices and Consequences
Sorry about the delay on Positive Guidance Posts! Hopefully the combination of a few topics here will make up for my paucity of posts!