Whole Child Development
I’m so excited to be featured today on Mandi Ehman’s podcast series at Organizing Your Way! She has a fantastic site and some exciting things coming up in the future. I’m flattered to be associated with her! Today, we’re talking about getting children ready for “Back to School”, specifically focusing on emotionally and socially preparing children for that big day! Click here to get all the details for the download!
I heard a comedian the other day, who really made a good point. He said essentially this: “My friends are always questioning my choice not to spank my kids. They’ll often say, “Never? You’ll never spank you kids? There’s no situation where you think you might need to spank your kids?” When I say I’ll never hit my wife, nobody says, “Never? You’ll never hit your wife? There’s no situation where you think you might need to hit your wife?” This logic got a good laugh from the crowd, and I think it was spot-on.
“Sharing” is a vague concept for young children. Most understand that everyone should share with them. Their egocentric minds interpret their happiness as everyone else’s. Learning that making others happy can actually help them as well, takes practice.
“Sharing” is a vague concept for young children. Most understand that everyone should share with them. Their egocentric minds interpret their happiness as everyone else’s. Learning that making others happy can actually help them as well, takes practice.
In Vivian Gussin Paley’s book, A Child’s Work: The Importance of Fantasy Play, she mentions the opportunity to use fantasy play as a tool for classroom management or child guidance. I found this interesting, and it caused me to think about that premise, the ways I have used it in the past, and the ways I could use it to smooth out difficult situations.
As she states, “Conversations with children may arise out a ‘last straw’ annoyance, in other words, or from a sense of dramatic flow. They can come from concerns over decorum or from respect for our imaginations. Both approaches will manage a classroom, but one seems punitive and the other brings good social discourse, communal responsibility, and may have literary merit.” (pg. 74)
In Vivian Gussin Paley’s book, A Child’s Work: The Importance of Fantasy Play, she mentions the opportunity to use fantasy play as a tool for classroom management or child guidance. I found this interesting, and it caused me to think about that premise, the ways I have used it in the past, and the ways I could use it to smooth out difficult situations.
As she states, “Conversations with children may arise out a ‘last straw’ annoyance, in other words, or from a sense of dramatic flow. They can come from concerns over decorum or from respect for our imaginations. Both approaches will manage a classroom, but one seems punitive and the other brings good social discourse, communal responsibility, and may have literary merit.” (pg. 74)
Studies have shown that, particularly in times of stress, we tend to revert to our past experience as our script. We teach as we were taught, we parent as we were parented. We may know better than the teachers we had, or we may want more for our own kids than we were given, but when the pressure is on we follow the script we learned from watching others. For some of us, with fortunate experiences and good role models, this truth is a blessing. For those with a less desirable childhood it can be a curse.
I was working with a group of teachers recently when a woman shared something that made me both sad and amazed. We had been talking about our own experiences being disciplined as children and she alluded to the fact that her father had often crossed the line into abuse. Decades later, the backs of her legs still bore scars where they had been accosted with switches and belts.
When you’re teaching young children a new set of responsibilities, it can sometimes feel like you’ve suddenly become a task-master, constantly nagging them to hang their coats over here, or get their dishes to the sink, or put their toys away when they’re done. If you’ve told them once, you’ve told them eleventy million times, right?
When we think of teaching children with natural and logical consequences, using time as a consequence is one that can fall into both categories. Let me tell you a story to illustrate. [Read more…]
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